If you’re experiencing an extended no sex phase, there may be underlying psychological, relational, or medical reasons for your low sex drive.
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Why Is My Sex Drive so Low? 5 Reasons for Your Low Sex Drive Phase
1. You’re a Newbie at Sex
Sex isn’t always a mind-blowing experience, especially if you’re new at it. In fact, for some women, it’s downright uncomfortable.
The awkwardness of sex at the beginning can sometimes make women question their sex drive. Remember though, good sex involves practice, communication, experimentation, and self-awareness.
So don’t feel discouraged if it isn’t great at the get-go. It may take some time to discover what works for you and your partner.
Timing is also a factor. You may have an excitable partner, while you may need some time to warm up to get in the mood.
Tip: It isn’t always easy to talk about sexual problems, but it’s important to be open about it with your partner. Ask your partner about their preference and try to communicate your likes and dislikes as well.
2. Sex Feels Painful
Experiencing pain during sexual intercourse is common. In fact, according to the American Academy of Family Physicians (AAFP), about 10-20% of women experience dyspareunia.
What is dyspareunia? It is a condition wherein women feel a recurrent or persistent pain when they engage in sexual activities. The pain may be felt upon penetration or during deep vaginal penetration.
In some cases, pain during sex may be a symptom of gynecological issues. For instance, painful sex is a symptom of endometriosis or an ovarian cyst.
What is endometriosis? This is a condition wherein tissues of the uterus grow in other pelvic organs.
For others, painful sex may be due to underlying psychological, mental health, or relational factors. Stress, negative emotions, history of sexual abuse, and relationship problems can have an impact on your sexual response.
Tip: It’s helpful if you identify when the pain occurs during sex. For instance, if it’s painful upon penetration, lubrication may help ease the discomfort.
3. You’re a New Momma
It’s natural for women to have lower sex drives while they’re adjusting to a new bundle of joy in their lives. Most women experience some degree of sexual problems within the first three months after delivery.
In fact, it can take some women 6-12 weeks before they bounce back from pregnancy and childbirth. It’s hard to get in the mood when you’re recovering from childbirth, getting used to your postpartum body, and taking care of a newborn at the same time.
Women who have vaginal births may also feel some pain and discomfort in their vaginas—especially if they had an episiotomy.
What is an episiotomy? This is a surgical incision from the perineum to the vaginal wall. This is done to enlarge the vaginal opening and prevent tearing while pushing the baby out.
Episiotomies are usually repaired soon after delivery, but it may take 2-3 weeks for it to completely heal. Apart from the physical changes childbirth brings, new moms are often sleep-deprived and over-tired.
Newborns are cute, but they can also be relentless. So, it’s completely normal if new moms are not interested in sex—they’re too busy trying to survive the sleepless nights!
Tip: Take your time and don’t rush the sex. Some couples need to learn how to be intimate again after welcoming a new addition to their family, so talk to your partner about your concerns and slowly ease your way back into intimacy.
RELATED: How Regular Sex Can Strengthen A Relationship
4. Menopause Is Around the Corner
When women go through menopause, there’s a sharp decline in estrogen. Estrogen is the primary female hormone.
It’s responsible for a variety of sexual and reproductive functions, including the maintenance of vaginal health. It regulates vaginal structure and lubrication.
So when estrogen drops during menopause, some women experience painful sex due to vaginal dryness. It can also begin to feel less flexible.
On top of that, estrogen is also responsible for maintaining optimal acidity levels in the vagina to help prevent infections. Women in menopause are at greater risk for vaginal infections which can also make sex uncomfortable.
Tip: Menopause doesn’t have to mean the end of your sex life. Consider consulting with an integrative health specialist to figure out ways to manage the symptoms of menopause.
5. Other Health Issues
Certain medical conditions may also lead to sexual dysfunction in women. Here are a few libido-hampering health conditions:
- Hypothyroidism – This is a condition where the body doesn’t produce enough thyroid hormones. This can lead to painful sexual intercourse, and it can also decrease a woman’s sexual arousal, vaginal lubrication, orgasm intensity, and overall sexual satisfaction.
- High blood pressure – High blood pressure may decrease the blood flow to the vagina which, in turn, impacts sexual arousal. It also contributes to fatigue.
- Diabetes – Women with diabetes can experience a decrease in arousal and inadequate vaginal lubrication. They can also experience pain during sexual intercourse or less frequent orgasms.
- Urinary tract infections (UTI) – Women who have UTIs report more sexual dysfunction compared to women who don’t have UTIs.
- Depression – Many women diagnosed with depression report lower levels of arousal and difficulty in achieving orgasms.
On top of that, certain prescription drugs can also lower a woman’s sex drive. For instance, antidepressants with selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors can decrease sex drive.
Tip: Talk to a healthcare professional to rule out any of these health issues. Always talk to your doctor before changing your medications.
The World Health Organization recognizes sexual health as a vital component in overall health and quality of life. Everyone deserves a satisfying sex life.
It’s normal to go through a dry spell every now and then, but if it lasts long enough it could have a negative impact on your health, happiness, and relationships. The good news is, there are things you can do to improve your libido.
If you’re serious about finding ways to treat your low libido, it may be helpful to talk to a health professional. An integrative health specialist may be able to help you understand the underlying causes of your low libido.
When you know what’s causing your low sex drive, it’s easier to find ways to treat it. So take a step towards reclaiming your sex life and contact the LIV Health Team today!
Are you interested in talking to an integrative health specialist? Let us know in the comments section below.
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